01 April 2011

TL;DR if you must but it's worth it.

Once again, I have decided to compile all those random junk mail ramblings of my long ago dormant email account. I have spent the better part of a week finding snippets and compiling them into a somewhat coherent, albeit nonsensical, story. Many of the junk mails ran a similar theme, using bits of both The Wizard of Oz and the later published prequel, Wicked, in their messages. As with the poem from a previous post, I pieced together the text without addition or subtraction of words, only grammatical polishing (poorly). Without further ado, I present the first ever short story of junk email entitled, Fucking in a Field of Dearest Oak Leaves.

Fucking in a Field of Dearest Oak Leaves

Dear brother,
For you have received this, also provide on contracting project chapter five.  You will see her eyes bulge like never before! My power that evening, and presently, button bright eyes with both hands and part through it the front legs. I return to obey the magic charm that is coming of the small cavern.


           “Since the kingdom looks as loud voice!” Pose declared. “Versions based on his mouth, the front legs, refute the exclusions agreement of Bilbil,” explained the ruler for nothing.
Kitticut had listened with interest. Law of Leaves was several times asserted in the books, one by one, that every direction began to find no royalty free plains. Well lighted and turning to hear, minutes later, the patchwork girl sighed and could still in much that muttered the bottoms of stately trees. Swift in her silence, for otherwise the dark shouted the sound of fun to look beyond here, Kitticut observed the kingdom which would announce the Laws are tax return.
Pose demanded the ugly one that come back against his square meal. They, instead of computer users, do anything sorry for public domain. After that direction, the three mortal maids murmured, screamed, “The emerald city had carried those queer creatures in his hair! Fight with fear that what Ojo wondered!”
Everyone who had seen before them seems to fight the crooked magician, Trot. Trot came down again in silence, and turning to growl at hearing this, admitted the door was greatly pleased with white pearl and many times roared the books and then fell down on each time. Seeing that in, and looked like someone has done with them each hour this year as that finally reached out on the frog. “Trouble with you may take care,” Trot began. “Here to break the land, life and Rink-i-tink who says so fast, strange sight of solid ground what she has become of water; become so fast as well known that. However he carried the strangers, who will, being made from you, call out that mountains answer the road of Ozma Polychrome, and take you just before they cause the dark well known as perhaps the others, except that nothing of Regos where many people fall into trouble with care of Oogaboo.”
Sometimes, it also to destroys you. Trot watched his former king, demanded the tube in wonder and therefore he turned to escape. Meantime, the gardener, who lives on land begged from the form of boats, ever he felt in some little hill to harm could fall off to fight the dishpan. Therefore as all ready for its tail, Pose covered it with straw and suggested Betsy in splendid emerald city, seeing this case the walls, so used the tiled floor.
“Suppose we ought to read this,” responded the yips who wore an hour and threw at once a shoe; and threw it indeed, unless you mean by any part that eggs were constantly being of rock.
Admitted the berries and Coregos, “Please do such damages even though they’re cruel, and proceeded, in front legs asked Quox as well that something wrong faced them and made prisoners to reach billion well pleased that night before.”
Fire pounded on request, at least protested, the tunnel which lay down. Prince of any longer in expression, Pose asked Ann, who stood beside Inga, to ask her house to make such good story books, one on both her hand, after her from someone has been stolen. Pose, you see how much, declared scraps laughed at hearing this, demanded the emerald city of damages, demanded the mines and did nothing ever. Inga thought that led from Project Gutenberg, medium it easy and murmured the wall was Ozma.
Remarked the hall, and every direction, “Therefore the winkie country that could hear the girl, Dorothy, who wanted to find him down rather than being now stood in Jinxland even now noticed that seems like! Also saw you ever find Sawhorse to search for goodness sake! Rink-i-tink was half an army! Open my neck with precious pearls!”
Inga would find the door. By nightfall they heard that Regos was facing the munchkin boy with Hank, with tin woodman of pure white form. Everyone who could feel the path, well here to rule them, then Inga said shaggy. Then there, and wondering what door shook his companions, Pose led the woozy. “Indeed,” he spoke, “for we need Nikobob. And therefore, during this the mountain side, during the winkie country at once, he wore an hour roared with big lavender bear and Ozma was ready to stand still alive.”
Murmured the young lady, “Who knew, however, had eaten by queen none of the books of Coregos. While we will soon as easily type directly to carry the tunnel well as for goodness me, please.”
“Saying this, when you are in the truth,” Pose explained, “the tin woodman of Coregos returned to fly over here. However for Rink-i-tink, the case laughed merrily and jewels before the river began the love to him here. Interrupted in the front door, Rink-i-tink, that when he sat on both of Oogaboo, therefore he fled from these slaves and had arrived.” Pleased with silver lined boat, he found many other Quox as on their feet in two hours. From what would miss scraps, floor with sharp points of every part, called to save Uncle Nunkie.
Asserted the prisoner, “Of course Button Bright had never could answer, does not allow you ever find Ozma. Prince, Inga could carry me with Tititi Hoochoo and with Hank taken altogether too near to sleep. Listen carefully, Pose, it myself for these there before seen Ozma of gold. Ojo looking down again pleaded the islands, of course not know presently the edges and by pons and silver lined boat.”
“Betsy promised, wound around with Tik Tok, of what makes me please. Betsy with Rink-i-tink was very small scarecrow, is otherwise provided to possess magic,” remarked Pose. However was embroidered the land and threw at hearing this, Kitticut received this, was astonished that.
“The shoes,” muttered she and laughed, “Ork flew away but soon found hard that case. For if Dorothy explained the mountain pass through, going on either side was like the row of tin woodman. Please note neither, Trot, you were mean nor Ojo cried wonder. What makes you this and admitted the front legs are tax return?”
The king remarked, “Therefore as far distance, the copper body understand, then you, everyone, in case for by if anything, we had left the banquet hall to escape.” The mines of Coregos murmured.
“Tik Tok, he went around,” remarked Inga. “Betsy laughed heartily at times, Rink-i-tink was more easily as well in search the honey. Dorothy, who in fact that seemed much and demanded the walls of these pearls is included below. Pose, we are now appeared before public domain, royalty free.”
Dear brother was greatly surprised, added that case for damages that lay before him of the earth. However they reached the straw in silence. Greatly impressed by the computers since they began drumming, Ojo cried, wondered what does.

Pleaded the young lady who lived with Pose, “Legs, are you my father?”

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